I tried to kill myself – the stranger who stopped me is now my husband

A 33 year-old woman who attempted to take her own life by sitting in front of a train has told of her astonishing survival — which she owes to a train driver, who later became her husband.

Mother-of-three, Charlotte Lay, suffers complex mental health problems including PTSD which, one day in 2019, led her to feel there was no way out. 

One morning, on her way to the hospital in Yorkshire where she worked as a nurse, she ‘impulsively’ decided to  jump from the train platform on to the tracks, and ‘sat there, waiting’. 

A train approached gradually, stopping in front of Ms Lay. The driver, Dave Lay,  got out of his cab and knelt down in front of her, introducing himself.

He told her they would talk things through ‘until she felt comfortable enough’ to get on to the train with him.

The pair talked for half an hour, by which time Ms Lay agreed to get on to the train. 

He dropped her off at Skipton Station where she was left in the care of the police.

Mr Lay had never had specialist mental health training. He said he simply ‘said all the things he wished he could’ve said’ to other people who have died by suicide.

The following day, she looked him up on Facebook in order to pay thanks for the kindness he showed in her moment of crisis at Crossflatts Station in Bradford, West Yorkshire.

Mr Lay responded, saying he was available whenever she needed to speak to someone. 

After this initial contact, they began exchanging messages on a daily basis. 

This went on for two months until the pair eventually agreed to meet for coffee.  

The rest is history: Three years later they tied the knot while Ms Lay was 22 weeks pregnant with their first child.

She said: ‘The conversation [on the train tracks] from what I can remember was just about mundane things and about both our lives, but it was enough to break the crisis.

‘Life didn’t feel as heavy anymore. The next day I made it my mission to find the man who had been so kind to me. 

‘Through Facebook and some colleagues of his, I found him. Now he’s my husband.’

Recalling the day of her suicide attempt she said: ‘I don’t know exactly what triggered it, but it was an impulsive decision.

‘I had my uniform on, fully prepared for work but something just didn’t feel right.

‘When I got off the train I just sat down on the platform. The conductor asked if I was okay and I said yes.

‘Sensing something was off he asked again if I was sure and I said yes and the train drove away.’ 

It was then that she decided to clamber down on to the tracks.

She said: ‘I hope that by sharing my story people will realise that although it would be ideal if we all had specialist training to deal with a mental health crisis, we are all capable of helping by being empathic and present.

‘I’m still receiving support for my mental health now, and I think I always will.

‘But I’m so grateful to Dave for stopping that day and being so patient and understanding.

‘I’d have understood if he didn’t want to hear from me, but I just wanted to say thank you for giving me the time and for treating me like I was human being.’

Mr Lay was equally relieved to hear from her as he’d ‘never had the opportunity’ to get off the train and talk to someone in crisis before.

He told the BBC: ‘I needed to know she was all right. I’d contacted police to try to find out what happened to her and just wanted to make sure she was safe.

‘I felt like I’d had a duty to make sure she was all right. We’d had that rapport built by the side of the track. It was just nice to be able to make that difference to somebody.’